Leland Food & Wine Festival 2013

If you combine my favorite place, my husband, wine, and good friends - you pretty much get an ideal summer weekend.

This past weekend John and I travelled 3.5 hours North to visit the Leland Food & Wine Festival with two other couples.

It was great to combine grad school friends, our husbands/future husbands, and some damn good booze.

My childhood summers always included a vacation to Leland and visiting Fishtown always brings back sweet feelings of nostalgia, incomplete without a North Shore sandwich from the cheese shoppe.

John and I firmly believe that taking time to be away, just the two of us, is key to keeping our relationship strong. This weekend was just what we needed!

 

 

Kayla, According to John

Okay, I saw Becky post about this and I knew I had to ask John to participate. Me from my husband's perspective? I couldn't resist the chance to see myself through his eyes - and I am not surprised that almost every fact he wrote had me laughing. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did :) 

Facts of Kayla according to John:

10 Facts about Kayla. A day.

1. The minute I wake up in the morning she takes over the entire bed, and not a single f**k will be given until Jack is up for the day.

2. She insists I give her a kiss and tell her I love her before I leave for work, no matter how asleep she is, and she is furious if I forget. (she also kisses me and tells me she loves me, every morning, no matter how asleep she is)

3. She never drinks her coffee hot, she waits at least 10-15 minutes before she will touch it... She likes her coffee lukewarm. Gross.

4. She claims to wear something Pink everyday... and technically this is true. But only because she has a pink tattoo!!

5. She has a 1 hour commute to school, which would absolutely kill me. She doesn't mind the drive though, apparently she had lots of road trips to her brother's hockey tournaments as a kid. She says I'm a wuss when I complain about my commute.

6. I have never seen Kayla in class - but I can almost guarantee she is the girl in class that all the professors love, and everyone sitting in the back (me, in undergrad) just absolutely cannot stand. You know the type.

7. Kayla and I talk everyday on our lunch breaks.

8. A family member told us at a wedding last weekend that she had never seen two people who thought the other was so funny. Making Kayla laugh is one of my favorite things to do, and she makes me laugh everyday.

9. Kayla will watch Oregon Vs. Louisville in the Sweet 16 if I will watch Lindsey Vs. Catherine on the Bachelor.

10. We watch Family Feud with Steve Harvey almost every night... and we are not ashamed of this. One day we will win fast money.

Spoiled

Happy love week! 
Before John, I was never a big Valentine's Day person. 
My parents were really good about emphasizing the extra opportunity to show love to those around you. Growing up there was always a box of chocolates and a little gift waiting for us on the kitchen table in the morning before school. But as I got older, it was usually a day to be disappointed by lack of a boyfriend or lack of effort by any current boyfriend. 
But with John? Somehow, Valentine's Day always manages to be pretty great for us. I wouldn't necessarily describe my husband as the romantic type, but homeboy does just fine for himself on February 14th. 
2 years ago, he put a ring on it. Enough said. 
Last year, I deemed it The Best Valentine's Day EVER. It was simple and inexpensive. Homemade gifts and dinner at home. 
This year? It's not even Valentine's Day yet and we are off to great start. 
For one, I am currently writing to you from my new baby:

Hello lover. 
On Friday I mentioned one of my February goals to be organizing the basement and making a functional study space. Well, ask and you shall receive. My husband bought me a BEAUTIFUL Ikea desk and just happened to set this pretty little computer right on top of it!
Oh, and you might remember when I put a certain Michael Kors watch on my Christmas list... well  Santa didn't put it under the tree, but my husband put it on my wrist last week!

Maybe these gifts are coming a tad early, but they are all in the name of dear old Saint Valentine! And let me tell you, I feel spoiled!
Of course it isn't all about the material things, but just the fact that I am able to sit and blog to you from my very own (pretty and organized) space, has me feeling so very loved by my Mr. 
I'm also pretty excited for our hot date on Thursday night to a restaurant we have been dying to try! 
How are you celebrating Valentine's Day this year? 
Happy Monday!

Golden Weekend

We took an "us" weekend. 
A college friend was celebrating his golden birthday on Saturday night and we decided to make the trip to Chicago to join in on the fun!

It was mid afternoon by the time we checked into our hotel. We took a cab to a quirky neighborhood bar. We sipped thick dark beers and ate fried cheese curds. We talked and we laughed. 
We laughed a lot. 
We met up with a group of our friends for a pre-party feast. We ate at my favorite restaurant to visit in the city and enjoyed small plates Italian, wine, and more laughter.
We went to a bar and bought $30 wristbands that I swore would be a waste because there was no way I could drink $30 worth of alcohol in 3 hours. I was wrong... I was so wrong. 

We were the first to have to bail on the party. It may have only been 12:30, but in Michigan it was 1:30 and we had to be lame and call it a night. 

We drunkenly ate the BEST chicken shawarma I have ever had. Ever. 
We slept in.  We. Slept. In. 
We left earlier than expected. Running away from what my husband called, "ice death". We pouted the whole way home, frantically trying to find the MSU basketball game on the radio. 
We were reunited with our sweet angel baby toddler who I missed incomprehensible amounts. 
It was a good weekend.
Sometimes it's good to know you can still just be a couple. Be husband and wife. Just that and nothing else. 

Different

I had this post all thought out and ready to go when my sweet boy came over to me and gave me an unsolicited snuggle. He climbed up onto the couch, wrapped his arms around my neck and laid his head on my chest. It lasted not longer than 30 seconds, but before he climbed down and went back to playing, he planted a soft little baby kiss on my lips. I was AGAIN reminded (for the gajillionth time since Jack was born) just how much I love my life and this little boy. 
I keep trying to put my feelings into words and it just really isn't coming out right. I'm not looking for pity. I'm really not looking for anything - except maybe a place to vent some feelings. This is whiny and spoiled and I just want to say up front that I acknowledge that. I am so lucky and so blessed and I know that too... Maybe 20, 30 years ago I wouldn't feel like this sometimes. But now? When most people get married in their mid to late twenties and wait to have kids until their late-twenties or early-thirties, I feel different.
Sometimes I wish I was 28. Random, I know. But lots of women at 28 are married with kids. They are far along enough in their careers to have houses and dual incomes. They "lived it up" in their twenties. They did things right.
But then I get mad. Why should I feel like the way I am doing things is wrong?! Maybe I feel that way because of the sweeping declarations from every 20-something in blog land (married or not) of how you really need your twenties to have fun and learn and blah blah blah. I don't judge that decision. Sometimes I do wish John and I had had more time to be just us... but because we didn't, I constantly feel defensive about it. 

Sometimes I feel left out. My friends are "living it up" (you know, the way you are supposed to) and I have stretch marks and the ability to get drunk from 3 sips of wine. Do not get me wrong. I LOVE being a mom. I really and truly believe that I was meant to be a mom. I always have. I always figured I would be the first of my friends to have kids too... I don't know. I just feel like I am an alien when out with people my age. The "married friend" the friend "with a baby". 

I also feel like people my age don't want to read this blog. They don't want to read about marriage and growing babies and how I went to sleep at 10 pm on a Saturday night. Other moms might not want to read this blog because I am 23 and what could I know or offer that is worthwhile? Every time I see that someone has "unfollowed" me I wonder if it's because they can't relate to me. It's silly, really silly. There are so many wonderful people that read my blog. They comment and email and make me feel heard. I have made friendships that I treasure. But sometimes this space adds to insecurities. 
Sometimes I hate that I can't just go to happy hour with my grad school friends. It's REALLY really stupid. Like, the most stupid thing to hate ever. I am exhausted at the end of the day, why would I want to go to a bar and drink one drink that will make me even sleepier? I suppose I sometimes hate that I don't have the option.
This is sounding whiny and silly and whatnot. There are a lot of people in my life that I can relate to. On marriage, on parenthood. I know that someday those 28 year old women that treat me like I am 12 years old will except me as a friend because a 5 year difference in age is really nothing. I know that when John and I are empty nesters in our early 50's I will be so pleased that we get to travel and spend A LOT of time "just the two of us". 

I guess I'm impatient. I'm sensitive. I'm defensive of my wonderful life. Who knows. Maybe there are other young moms or wives out there that feel the same. Maybe other wives or moms, in general, that can relate to this. 
I'm going to pretend that at least one person read this and could relate and feels less alone because of it so that I feel less whiny/spoiled... 

http://thememoirsofmegan.com/

Trust.

I think we can easily throw around the word trust without ever really thinking about what it means or how important it is to our everyday relationships. 
I think it was really easy for me to say that I trust my husband. I mean, I did pledge my life to him and live with him. But what that trust meant? I guess I didn't really know until recently. 
I went into my marriage knowing that there would be bumps. John and I's relationship has successfully sustained many a bump in the road, and I feel extremely confident that with each bump we become stronger, more sure of ourselves as a couple. 
We hit a fairly big bump before Christmas. But you know what? A situation that would have most people stressed out of their minds... we rode out like it was no big deal. Yeah, it was a big deal - but my complete confidence in my husband and trust that we would be okay no matter what, only made us stronger. 
We supported one another, stood by each other's side and came out the other end of things ON TOP. Sometimes scary things lead to amazing things. So that trust? It's stronger now. And I appreciate it so much more. 
I have a hard time always trusting God's plan. For some reason I think I have the right to know the answer to it all. But I'm never going to have all of the answers. I can speculate and analyze and make guesses, but at the end of the day I need to put trust in my faith and let it go! 
...Easier said than done. But I'm trying.

One.

On this day one year ago...

I woke up early, before anyone else. It was still dark outside.
I nursed Jack in the quiet silence in my parents living room.

It wasn't long before my mom came padding out of her bedroom,
whispering "goodmorning" and kissing the top of my head.

I felt so calm. I didn't expect to.
I also didn't expect the perfect & peaceful night sleep I had,
and was grateful for the rested feeling that had settled into my bones.

I handed Jack over to his grandma and slipped downstairs for a quick shower.
My sisters came busting into the bathroom mid leg-shave singing loudly,
"We're going to the chapel and we're gonna get marrrrrrrried!"

The day was here.

After many hours at the salon, nibbling on fruit, laughing with all of my favorite girls,
getting beautiful,
I sat as still as possible as my cousin created my dream wedding hair and perfected my lipstick.

I'll never forget the moment my veil was placed carefully on top of my head.
"Holy shit - I'm a bride!" was what ran through my head.
and we all started laughing to stop the tears that threatened to ruin my perfect mascara!

I arrived home with my sister ahead of everyone else.
I took a quiet moment to pump (so glamorous)
& rest for 20 minutes before the rest of the day came cascading down on me.

The early afternoon was a bustle of bridesmaids getting dressed
and anxiety building as my mom took 100 YEARS to get ready/come help me get my dress on.
I. was. ready.

We ended up in the storage room in my parents basement.
That is where we had been hiding the dress & for whatever reason we just stayed there.
It's a hilarious backdrop to one of the most precious moments shared between my mother & I.

I kissed Jack goodbye & snapped a quick picture with my daddy
before boarding the trolly waiting outside of the house.

I was excited, nervous, ready to go!!!

We waited outside of the church, a few family members coming in and out.
I had to ask everyone I saw how John was.
Was he nervous? Calm? Sweating like crazy???
I couldn't wait to see him!

When it was time to go in my stomach was in knots of anticipation.
The smile on my face was a permanent tattoo of bliss.

 

My dad kept taking off for some fresh air and a quick sob,
my aunt happily ushered off each bridesmaid, one by one.
I crouched behind a staircase and listened to the beautiful music serenading the perfection.

It was time.

My daddy took my arm and we made our way to the end of the aisle.

There may have been 150+ people staring at me, but all I saw was John.
The face I had pictured in my dreams.
The dreams I had had of my wedding day for as long as I can remember.

The vows - I will never forget.
I have never been more in a moment,
I have never felt the impact of my words resound so deeply into my being.
Each promise was a brand on my heart,
bonding me to the man I couldn't see one second of my life without.

The rest of the day was truly celebration.
I have never felt more blessed or alive.

One year later these memories are still so vibrant. 

I know that as each year passes they will become more fuzzy, 

less real and more dreamlike. 

I couldn't feel more blessed in my marriage. 

How lucky am I?

We are growing, we are learning, I hope we always will!

Honey, thank you for being there every morning and every night. Thank you for being my constant. I love you more than I did one year ago. Happy anniversary!

Pictures in this post are a combination of the Keck Family Photography/Emily Zoladz